Saturday, September 27, 2008

White Collar Crime

I just got back from the A&P with my husband who attempted white collar shoplifting, used me (unbeknownst to me) as his accomplice and got caught.
He "bought" 2 cans of ultra-premium pasta sauce ($8 per can) by placing them into his cart. He then used 2 coupons to get them for free. As he scanned each coupon, he handed them over to me to give to the cashier. During this transaction, I was not allowed to chit chat with him. I didn't understand why he was being so grouchy. My attempts to make friendly talk was met with aggressive shushing and belligerent waving of the hands. Any way, then he scanned another coupon and asked me to give that coupon ($4 off) to the cashier. His criminal mind was trying to scam $4 from innocent parties. The $4 off coupon was for the sauces that he already got for free. He wanted them to pay him!!! He wanted his net to be 2 jars of sauce and +$4!!!
The cashier stopped him dead in his tracks, called him out on it. "What?! You got the sauce for free, you can't use another coupon!" she chastised. Josh wasn't even embarrassed. "So? I know!" he bellowed proudly and took the coupon back. If I were her, I would've ripped up the coupon and scare him a little by calling the cops. In any case, I wanted to bury my head in the sand.

5 comments:

Katie & Rich said...

That is quite humorous!!!!

Farnk said...

It just makes me sick. And to think that he had to involve you and subject you to embarrassment. At the Price Chopper yesterday S. got two tubes of toothpaste, two Clif energy bars and 3 apples for free. AND (the apples were scanned incorectly) when she went to customer service for a 'refund' on the apples (not just to be charged the sale price) she said "Is that all you can do for me?" and the woman handed over a $2 shopping coupon for her next trip to the store. Some people have 'chutzpah.' But I think S's experience was more legit than J's.

Anonymous said...

Whatever you do, don't let him know that you can go online to NYTimes.com and claim that your newspaper never turned up and you want a credit - they won't check, and you'll get a free paper!

But don't make the mistake of accidentally donating that paper to a school or anything naff like that, rookie mistake! HAHAHA!

Haik Bedrosian said...

"...I wanted to bury my head in the sand."

Oh, you love it!

Anonymous said...

wow, so embarassing. does he really need to do that?