Sunday, November 18, 2007

Dollar got you down?

I am so pissed off that the dollar is practically worthless. I blame it all on Bush and the war. The only reason why it's worth anything is because of China. As soon as they stop pegging the yuan to the dollar, we are all fucked.
Let's fantasize about the past...I have fond memories of visiting Italy in 2001. Everything was thousands of lira but it always worked out to only a few dollars. Everything was so cheap and affordable; whenever I ate a meal I liked I had Donald Trump-esque condescending thoughts...Hmmm I wonder if I should buy this restaurant?
And now, can you believe that the Canadian dollar is on par with ours? What's an American to do?
Get yourself a personal assistant from Bangalore! Check out Ask Sunday, and this newstory. For $30 a month, your PA from India will run the kinds of errands where physical presence isn't needed. Your Indian PA will dispute charges on your credit card, book frequent flier rewards and stay on the phone for these types of time consuming, hold-intensive and often frustrating errands.
Recently I've been so frustrated with trying to book frequent flier rewards with Emirates Airlines. It's obvious to me that their call center is outsourced to India. I can tell by the fuzzy connection and the accent. Who do they think they're fooling with their ridiculous pseudonyms like Steve? I know your real name is something like Subhabrata, not Steve!
So I see another benefit to outsourcing your errands to India...imagine your PA calling Emirates, asking for "Steve". I'm sure that "Steve" will immediate recognize my PA's accent and ask, Hey where are you from? And then they'll start rapping about India. Now as the conversation gets friendlier, you can imagine they might start talking about their work. You work for an American call center? Me too! Where do you work? In Bangalore. Me too! Blah blah blah and the ultimate climax that I'm hoping for -- realizing that they're in the same building, my PA will stand on his chair and hi-five Steve over the cubicle wall. Everybody wins! I'm so happy that for a few worthless dollars, I get to use my miles without talking to anyone. And if anyone wonders how I can possibly claim mileage rewards so effortlessly, I can say truthfully, through my connections.

2 comments:

Lost in Dixie said...

I didn't realize that China pegged the yuan to the dollar. I thought that China just bought a lot of US dollars and basically floated our debt....I agree that they could easily ditch the US dollar for Euros.....but everyone agrees that the Euro is way too strong.

Cassandra Jupiter said...

Dix, hahaha! I think they buy a lot of $$ in addition to pegging their currency to the dollar. And HOLY SHIT!! The citizens of the rich Persian Gulf states, SA, UAE and Qatar are pissed about their inflation because their currencies are pegged to the dollar too! We are so screwed!